August 21, 2008
THE SEVEN OF SWORDS
| JACQUELYN BENSON |
|
|
You think you’ve gotten away with it, don’t you? You think you’re so clever. And don’t try to play innocent with me. You know perfectly well what I’m talking about. You can feel it rotting in your guts, this nasty little lump of bad—that’s where what you know you did sits. And you’re proud of it, too. You’re proud because you got away with it. You pulled the wool over on everybody. In fact, it was even easier than you’d thought it was going to be. People just don’t pay all that close attention, or maybe they’re really not that bright. But you sure are. Bright enough to fool all of them. And then there’s that little twinge you still feel every now and then, a little tremble in your bowels. That’s the fear that someday your sins really are going to get out, that somebody’s on your tail and just when you least expect it, they’re going to blow the cover off the whole thing. You kind of like that, too, don’t you? Just adds to the thrill. And you don’t really think they’re going to get you —no, not really. You’ve been smart about it. You covered your tracks. You did everything just right. You’re not really worried.
But you should be. Because you’re bright—you sure are bright. But so are the rest of them. And they’re pretty good at covering their tracks, too. In fact, they’ve been covering them for quite a while now—covering them up real good. Pulling the wool right over your eyes. And then they sit there across the table from you, walk past you in the office, stand behind you in the lunch line and every one of them is feeling that little tremble in their bowels, that same little tremble of fear and self-satisfied glee you’ve gotten to know so well. Because they’re getting away with it. They’re pulling it off right under your nose.
Who, you want to know? But the real question is—what? Is it your money? Your job? Your lover? Your good name?
They’re taking it right out from underneath you, and you don’t even know what it is.
Of course I’m not going to tell you. And damn if that doesn’t make my bowels feel good.
Jacquelyn Benson’s sci-fi and fantasy-themed plays can be seen in theaters throughout New England. Her contribution to Behind the Wainscot is one of her first ventures into prose. She likes prose, and believes she will probably try more of it. She wakes up most mornings in a house on the beach with a cat on her feet and makes a mean goulash. If you ask her nicely, she’ll probably give you the recipe.